Late Again, Saheeb

Back to the salt mines after a day working with the nation's youth at the Insurance Brokers of Sacramento youth golf tournament yesterday. I was a Marshall and the going was much easier this time around. I made a few rulings, helped a couple of the girls determine where to drop a ball that was hit into a hazard and settled a dispute in a group where one player kept hitting ahead of another because the other was so slow. I hit him with the "Ready Golf" slogan and reminded the two boys that they were not playing match play. The tournament was held at the newly redesigned Del Paso Country Club, a country club that shut its doors for two years as they redesigned the course, taking it down to bare ground and redoing all of the fairways and greens. It is beautiful, but confusing as the course designer decided not to use tee markers to help give the course a natural look and feel. The problem is that as several holes come together it is nearly impossible to determine which is the next hole. We had one group of fifteen year-olds that played number 13, 14, then played number 8 and we found them looking for hole 16. We informed them that they had played out of order and ferried them over to hole 15 where the group behind them was just getting ready to tee off. We had to insert them back into their position which didn't sit well with either the other players or their parents. They then played the course around to number 7 and then skipped to number 9. It was a shotgun start and there were golfers walking all over the course looking for their starting holes. What a mess.

We finished the tournament about 1:45 with lunch and the awards presented. We then drove out to Rancho Murietta and played the south course. I shot 87, but was tired.

I did play last week at Woodcreek and shot 84 and had one of my better rounds in the second Diamond tournament this weekend, a modified Stableford event with points for par, birdies, eagles and double eagles, zero points for a bogey and negative points for double bogey or higher. I shot 79 and managed 30 points, which gave me low net in my flight and third place in the Stableford scoring. I'll play Castle Oaks this weekend in Ione and we hope to take the jet ski out on Sunday.

The saga continues with my front desk position as my new employee shut down her computer at ten o'clock yesterday morning and walked off the job. She did not talk to anyone or explain herself. We called the service and they couldn't find her and promised to have a replacement on the job this morning. What is going on with young people these days?

Darla and I had a relaxing weekend with time in the pool and just a lot of down time. The Placer County Fair was going on this weekend and we considered going to it, but it seemed a better time to just relax on the pool with a cold drink and a good book. We are getting good at being lazy lately.

Jennifer continues to work in Las Vegas, but is not yet convinced that this job is the job for her. The hot work of pulling wires and cable in attics reaching 140 degrees in Vegas seems perhaps more than she bargained for. She is willing to ride it out and see if more of her work can be in comfortable air conditioned buildings in the future. She was in Anaheim last week at a home electronics expo, but said that it was mostly boring and monotonous. I guess when you have had business trips to Baghdad and Kuwait on your resume, Anaheim is a bit low key.

Darla and I have a week's vacation coming up next month to Lake Almanor. The resort that we have stayed at (remember the cabin where the sink fell off the wall?) has closed and we will stay at a relatively new resort with boat slips and a position close to the marina with the gas station and restaurants right on the water. We will, of course, take our jet ski up to the lake and spend a week relaxing and taking it easy. We had planned on going to Hawaii this year for Daniel's senior trip, but with the cost of the pool and Cal Poly that plan was pushed out of the picture. Darla is still working on winning a trip to Maui in February of 2008 with Silpada. She is close and has parties through Thursday night in an attempt to meet the target.

Our DirecTV went out this weekend followed very quickly by a nasty worm that got embedded into the start up program of our computer.The virus gives a false warning about a virus attack on our computer and directs us to buy their spyware product. The worm is nasty as I can remove it, but it comes back as soon as I reboot my computer because the link is in the startup registry and as soon as it reboots the virus recreates itself in the hard drive.

The picture above is for Jennifer's benefit as I bought a new lounge chair and clock/thermometer for the back yard with the gift card that she bought me for Father's day. Thank you, Jennifer, now we know what time it is when the temperature reaches 100 degrees in Sacramento. At least I can lie down when that happens.

In truth, it has been a mild Spring and a cool start to the Summer as we have reached the century mark only once in the Sacramento area and our weather this week is supposed to cool into the upper eighties later this week and over the weekend. It could stay like this all Summer as far as I'm concerned. The pool is at 86 degrees and is very comfortable. I jumped in and cooled off when I got home from golf last night. What a great way to relax and cool off.

Well, this is short. I'm sorry I was late with the update this week, but I had the junior golf yesterday and I couldn't get to a computer. I was at the course at 7 AM yesterday and didn't get home last night until 8 o'clock. I hope you are all doing exceedingly well. Ciao.

Father's Day is Done and Gone

Father's day has come and gone and unfortunately, I didn't get to talk to either my Dad or my daughter on Father's Day. Jennifer and I were missing each other all weekend and playing a monster game of phone tag. Dad and Shirley were out when I called last night. Jennifer sent me a gift card for Lowe's and a book on golf inspired by a man who is dying. God arranges for 18 holes with world luminaries and if he wins, he lives. If he doesn't, he dies. Doesn't sound like my God, but it should be an interesting read with the likes of Marilyn Monroe and Leonardo Da Vinci playing golf. I will hit Lowes in the next week and see about getting some things for the backyard. I'd like to get a clock and a large thermometer to mount on the house.

This weekend I tended to take it easy as it was fairly warm and I wanted to just relax in the pool and take it easy after Darla was gone last week. We considered taking the jet ski out, but it seemed like a lot of work and Daniel had to work on Saturday. I got a sunburn for my efforts as I fell asleep on a raft floating on the pool and my swim suit hiked up and exposed some virgin white flesh to the rays of the sun. My upper thighs are the color of a taillight right now. It was nice to relax with Darla and just take it easy. We barbecued chicken Saturday night and ate on the patio next to the pool. Darla cut up some fresh fruit including watermelon and we enjoyed our backyard oasis. We have enjoyed the pool so much, we wish we had done it eight years ago when we moved into the house.

As you can see from the pictures, Buddy got his annual summer cut and we were able to get the jet ski moved into the driveway on the side of the house. We had hoped to leave Buddy's hair a little longer, but his hair gets matted along his skin and it is easier for the groomer to cut him short. They did leave a little more hair, but he went from a red dog to a white one overnight.

It is payday today and I have to get the minions paid, so this won't be long. I did terminate the front desk position. The young lady missed three of the first six days and then when I sat down to talk to her about it, she said, "This probably isn't the best time to ask, but I need Wednesday and Friday off." I gave her a permanent time off as I told her it just wasn't working out. She will land another job as she interviews very well. She apparently just doesn't like to work. I have a replacement in working for me now from an agency. The cost is higher, but if it doesn't work out, I just ask them to send me a replacement.

I have had some interesting employees over the years including a girl with food allergies who used a portable fan because she had such bad gas. She also had to sit on a hard surface seat because the soft surfaces caused her to flatulate. She was a very nice girl, but was too high maintenance. She would also fart in meetings and then leave the room, leaving the rest of us gasping. Food allergies, eh? She was with a temp firm and I was able to get out of that one without too much stink.

The pastor continues his series on love and told the story this weekend of the first Husband store in New York City. The store has six stories and the rule is that you can purchase a husband on any of the floors, but once you have moved up from a floor, you cannot go back down except to exit the store. A woman entered the store and on the first floor there was sign that read: "Husbands for sale. On this floor each man has a job." The woman got on the elevator and went to the second floor. On that floor the sign read: "Husbands for sale. On this floor each man has a job and loves children." The woman got on the elevator and went to the third floor. On that floor the sign read: "Husbands for sale. Each man has a job, loves children and is drop dead gorgeous." The woman was excited, but got on the elevator to see what was on the fourth floor. On that floor, the sign read: "Husbands for sale. Each man has a job, loves children, is drop dead gorgeous and is a hopeless romantic." The woman was thrilled and ran for the elevator. On the fifth floor the sign read: "Husbands for sale. Each man has a job, loves children, is drop dead gorgeous, is a hopeless romantic, cooks and does housework." The woman was ecstatic and couldn't wait to get to the sixth floor, where the sign read: "Welcome to the sixth floor. You are the 6,475,325th visitor. There are no men on this floor. This floor exists solely to prove that women are impossible to please."

I did play golf this past week. I played Woodcreek on Wednesday and shot 41+40=81. I also played with Boyd, Bob and Mel on Saturday and shot 42+42=84 at Diamond Oaks. I will play in the second Diamond tournament on Saturday. The tournament is a Stableford scoring event with points for birdies, eagles and double eagles. Zero points for par and negative points for bogey or worse. It will be fun and I play with Bob Pando, Boyd and Mel Padeirnos.

Well, that's it. I have to get on to payroll. Have a great week and keep your white upper thighs out of the sun. Ciao.

Day Off from Work, But Life Is Still One Busy Son Of A ...

I apologize to my three faithful readers, but I was helping out as a rules official at our golf club's annual junior golf tournament. This was our 40th annual tournament and it was named for David Oxley, Jr. who died in 1967 at the age of 15 on a camping trip up to the Mokelumne River. David was a cart barn kid who, at age 15 was a scratch golfer and likely headed to the pro tour. He died while walking along the river when he slipped and was pinned below two rocks on an outcropping at the river's edge. His father was a founding member of the Roseville Golf Club and the tragedy so affected the members of the club that they founded an annual junior golf tournament that is now the third longest running junior golf event in California. The golf as usual was high calibre with the two low scores of 70 in a playoff for low gross. I had to leave at four o'clock for a dentist appointment so I didn't see the results of the playoff. The two playoff participants were a 16 year old boy and a 17 year old boy. They played from the blue tees and shot two under par. The other exciting score was 35 for nine holes from an eleven year old boy. Cameron Champ has been playing golf since he was 18 months old and turns 12 next week and will finally be able to play 18 holes on the junior golf circuit. He played in the State Fair championship last year as an 11 year old and shot 77-79 from the blue tees at Alister McKenzie Golf course in Sacramento. He also played in the Roseville City Amateur and shot 78. Remember the name. The kid is the son of a black father and white mother and has incredible talent (sound vaguely familiar?). He is also (so far) just a great and genuine kid. He came up to me after playing and shook my hand and thanked me for helping out at the tournament.

The day was not without it's problems, mostly caused by parents. On one of the par threes a young man of 9 years of age hit his ball into the water hazard. He quickly re teed his ball and hit another in the water. The other two guys teed off and he then re teed his ball and hit another into the water. He said he wanted to quit, but one of his playing partners told him he could drop up by the water. His Dad approached me and started berating me for not telling him that he could drop up by the water hazard. I told him that the rules are clear. My role is to interpret rules and to make sure that the kids are playing by the rules of golf, NOT to give advice. The kid finally asked me if he could drop the ball up at the water and I then gave him his options..re-teeing the ball, dropping two club lengths from the water hazard, picking a spot on the line from where the ball last crossed the water hazard and the pin and as far back as desired (no nearer the hole), or a point on the opposite margin of the water hazard equidistant from the hole. The father kept on me and I told him if he didn't zip it, his kid would be disqualified. He then backed off, but I heard him refer to someone as an A**hole. I'm sure he wasn't referring to me. I also had several parents challenge me when I told them to stay off of fairways and near the green. They are a gallery and cannot give advice or help their child in any way. Most of the problems occurred around greens when the parents wanted to stand at the green and watch their child putt. One father said, "I have a real problem with the way you interpret the rules." I told him that their was no interpretation, the rules state that spectators must stay off of fairways and 25 yards from the contestants. I explained to him that 25 yards equals 75 feet, not 25 feet. He asked me for my name and I asked him for his. He quickly backed down. Golf parents are like any sporting parent. Most are great, some are jackasses. The funny part is that most of the really good golfers have parents that know and respect the rules and they wouldn't endanger their child's chance at the tournament by breaking the rules or questioning a tournament official.

Neil, who is the RGC President this year, couldn't believe that I scheduled both a Summer tune-up of my jet ski and a dentist appointment on the day of the golf tournament. I told him that I'm a working man and have to take advantage of my days off. We had plenty of help, almost too many volunteers, and the day turned out great. It was about 90 degrees, but the tournament started at 9:00 AM and it was still 80 degrees at noon. I will be running the tournament next year and won't have jet ski maintenance and dentist appointments on that day.

The dentist appointment was to have a crown installed and a filling replaced. The tooth cracked under the filling and he had to chisel it out and refill it. That was not pleasant as he used the high speed drill to carve out the old filling and I was climbing the walls. He had to numb both bottom sides of my mouth and my whole bottom jaw, tongue and chin were numb with Novocaine. When I was finished, the dental hygienist told me to rinse, but to leave the bib on until I was finished. I shrugged and rinsed and saw the water run out of my frozen mouth and down the front of the bib. I came home and laid down on the bed and slept for two hours. I got up, took two Excedrin, hand watered several sections of the lawn and some plantings of ground cover where I took cuttings and replanted it this weekend. I then moved into the study and the writing of this epistle.

It is quiet around here as Darla is in Hooterville, Idaho for a family reunion camping extravaganza. She flew out with Alicia at two yesterday and they flew from Sacramento to Boise and then boarded a puddle jumper from Boise to Lewiston, ID. From there they were forty-five minutes by car up to a campground devoid of power and facilities. I guess people from Idaho call that living. I have another name for it.

She took my cell phone and called me today to let me know they made it to their destination. I had tried calling her and the phone bounces right to voice mail. I think the reception is spotty. She couldn't talk long because she was perched in the top of a tree to get good reception.

I had a fence repair company come out last week and fix the automobile gate on the side of the house. He took one look at the job and tore it down to the posts and rebuilt it. One of the posts had warped and pulled the gate out of alignment. He rebuilt the gates with the proper support and I'm ready to put the jet ski away in the backyard. In fact, I pulled it up to the gate and backed it into the side yard. Unfortunately, I couldn't swing the ski by hand into the spot as the driveway is too slanted, so backed it into the garage to await some help from Darla or the boys. I suppose if I'd worked at it, I could have got it, but Neil was waiting for me and I didn't want to get run over or pinned by my own jet ski. I'm including a picture of the side driveway so you can see what I was facing. This is before the gates were rebuilt, so you can see the bow in the gate.

The Pastor is continuing his series on Love and he continued on the theme of gender for household items. He mentioned that a Glad freezer bag is male, because a man wants to lock things away and keep secrets, but you can see right through him. A vacuum cleaner is female, because it keeps everything around it neat and tidy, but it's a mess inside. The groans were audible by all of us as well.

I did get out and play golf this weekend and shot 42+40=82 at Diamond Oaks. I will play Woodcreek on Wednesday afternoon, Diamond on Thursday in my twilight league, the putting championship Friday night and Diamond Oaks on Saturday. Darla gets home on Thursday and has a party that night for Silpada. She is still hoping to qualify for the trip to Maui in January.

My new front desk clerk that showed up for her first day seven weeks pregnant has missed three of her first six days and I think I'll be firing her tomorrow. Her child was sick with diarrhea today. For some reason, my staff always wants to be specific when calling in sick..."I've been up all night puking, or I have a really bad rash and have to go the doctor", or some other much too personal set of circumstances. I looked back at the blog and can't believe that I didn't mention my new employee. I had interviewed for two solid weeks and hired a 23 year-old single girl who is engaged to be married. She seemed very responsible. She showed up her first day and told me she is seven weeks pregnant, has two other children and that she'd be late on Friday because she has a pre-natal appointment. I was devastated as I certainly couldn't renege on the job offer. Well, her attendance is enough to write her ticket out of there. She even said to me that she understands if I have to replace her. I will let the professionals in our Human Resources department get me out of this one.

Jennifer is gainfully employed in Las Vegas, now working for a Home Audio specialty company that builds and installs in-home theater systems, security alarms, security cameras and even in-home movie theaters. The average home that they work on is $10 to $15 million and their portion is often $500,000 to $1,000,000. She interviewed with the President of the firm in an $18 million mansion that is next door to Celine Dion's house in Vegas. She is thrilled to be working again and will be flying to Los Angeles to attend a convention of home electronics companies in a few weeks. Check out her blog at the link above and on the right.

Well, that is news to the minute. Stay well and keep turning the important decisions in your life over to God. Ciao.

No more bloody High Schoolers in this household!

Graduation is done and over, the party has been held, the cake cut and we are on to new and higher heights. Finally at age 50 with a daughter almost 27 who has seen more of the world than I ever will, has learned to lob grenades, been gassed with a gas mask on, and has served in Kuwait, Iraq and Germany; finally the last student is done with high school. Now, come next January, and by the will of God, all birds will be out of the nest and I can enjoy my empty nest period in solitude and tranquility. We'll see.

Daniel's graduation was Friday night and over 500 graduates filed up and got their diplomas, songs were sung, speeches made by valedictorians and class officers linking pirates to graduates and all of the other nonsense that flows out of the mouths of 17- year olds. It was a long service under blue skies, with a slight breeze and temperatures only in the low eighties. A vast improvement from the 100 degree temperature of David's graduation in 2005. Alas, it was too long, overblown and uncomfortable. Luckily, we sat with Greg Meacham and made snide remarks under our breath.

Saturday I played golf and shot 44+41=85. My index has dropped to 10.5 in June and my handicap is now 11 at Diamond, so I should shoot 83. It was a good time on Saturday and I got to play with Dave Armijo, my old partner from Diamond who abruptly quit playing in 2005 after the birth of a grandchild. Dave shot 88 in only his second round of the year. I checked my card and have played 44 rounds so far this year. After golf, I drove out to Lowes and Home Depot and bought another sego palm for our palm garden over the pool and 10 bags of Ebony bark for the pool area planters. I laid that and went back for another six bags which finished the job. It looks really good, like lava or charcoal.

The party today was a success and we had about thirty people come by including the boys' 88- year old Great Grandfather and Joni, their Mom's best friend who lived with them for five years after Darla's divorce. We had a lot of our friends, including Rob McHone and his 16-year old daughter, Jacki, who hadn't seen Daniel in a year. She and Dan are off to a movie as I write this still catching up on old times. I can't blame Dan as Jacki has really grown up cute with a great personality. David is off to his Gathering college group at church. We played pool, talked, the kids swam and we ate a lot of cold cuts and chicken.

Church was great this morning. We are working on a series about Agape love using the 1st Corinthians 13 text. The pastor told a joke about a computer class that was being taught at the college. One of the coeds (a blonde) asked what gender a computer was. The instructor broke the class into groups to have them decide the answer and this is what they came up with.

The girls decided the computer was male because,

1. A computer has alot of raw data and can't process it.

2. After you buy it, you realize that if you waited, you would have been able to get a much better model at a lower price, and

3. In order to make it do anything, you have to turn it on.

The boys disagreed and said the computer was definitely female because,

1. Every mistake you make goes into long term memory.

2. As soon as you buy it alot of the other computers start looking alot more attractive, and

3. As soon as you commit to it, you spend half your paycheck on accessories.

Darla is off to some remote camp in Idaho next week for her aunt's 70th birthday celebration. She and Alicia fly out next Sunday night and fly home on Wednesday. Darla's folks will be there with their 5th wheel, so at least they will be staying in relative comfort. Darla knows me well enough that she didn't even ask me to go. I can do without a trip to Deliverance.

Well, this is short, but I have the Sacramento Insurance Group golf tournament tomorrow and I am on the committee. The current golf director has dropped some broad hints that they want me to run the tournament in 2008. We'll see. Next Monday, the 11th, is the David Oxley junior tournament at our Roseville Golf Club and I will be marshaling that event. It is definitely Summer in Sacramento. Be well. Ciao.